your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
