I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
