there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
