real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
We got so high we made milksteak
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
