clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I have post one night stand depression
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