So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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