i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Can I color on your dick again?
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
