Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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