Just cropdusted the office
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
