As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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