Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I just threw up on my dentist
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
