i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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