there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Randomize
