i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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