Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
