she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize