Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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