so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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