You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
