That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
