Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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