Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize
