woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
