Whatcha textin bout Willis?
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
