what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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