I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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