omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
