You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Randomize
