If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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