Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
