alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
