Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
