I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
