I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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