she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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