She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
