wat bout pragnant strippers??
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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