so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
