Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Randomize
