new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Randomize
