dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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