When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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