i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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