I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
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