i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Randomize
