..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
