Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Randomize
