Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
