I hate your face
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
