I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
